Lynn J Kelly offers another helpful blogpost on how and why we might meditate. I encourage you to check out her link below for all of her mindfulness offerings.
Here’s a quick explanation of people to avoid: the taker, the talker, the flatterer, and the reckless from Lynn J Kelly. See picture above and link below. Thank you, Lynn.
We all need refuge from overwhelming times. Some people hide behind watching TV, overeating or overdrinking, or spending time with people doing things that may hurt us in the long term.
Today, Lynn J Kelly, an Australian American practicing Buddhist, offers another option that may be of some interest to you. See her blogpost below:
One “becomes a Buddhist” by sincerely taking refuge in the Buddha, Dhamma, and Sangha. This is only meaningful if we have some sense of what that means. When we are afraid or unhappy, where do we go? Most of us take refuge in the ordinary comforts of our lives – music, on-line entertainment, TV, food, reading, friends or family, or some activity that we find absorbing. From the Pali canon:
They go to many a refuge, Those who have been struck by fear; They go to mountains and forests, To parks and trees and shrines. (Dhammapada 188, translated by John Kelly)
However, these refuges only offer temporary relief.
When we take refuge in the triple gem (Buddha, Dhamma, Sangha), we are saying that when things get rough, we look to:
the Buddha as an embodiment of the potential for awakening in all humans (including ourselves);
to the Dhamma as the body of the Buddha’s teachings on reality as we can experience it; and
to the Sangha, the worldwide, time-spanning community of serious practitioners of the Buddha’s path.
Many of us started looking into the Buddha’s path with only a vague hope that it might help us become less confused. We naturally want to minimize suffering for ourselves and others, but how to go about that can be mysterious.
Committing to the Buddha’s path takes time. It generally requires some motivation (suffering?) and some inspiration, through reading or hearing about the Buddha’s teachings. But it’s only by taking up and trying out the Buddha’s instructions in our own lives that we develop faith – faith in the possibility of awakening, faith that the Buddha himself and many others have tasted the freedom he points to. For example, the teachings on how generosity and ethical behavior affect our mind state, if put into practice, will quickly produce results in our experience.
The thought of meditating can be a stumbling block for new practitioners. Remember that nothing special is meant to happen. We could think of it simply as a short period of unplugging from our normal inputs. We find a way to set worries aside and relax for 20 minutes or so, usually by training the attention on the breath or some other neutral object. If we accept whatever energy is in our body and mind, as it is in the present moment, we may find that it changes and is gradually replaced with a relatively steadier mind state. In this way, step by step, we learn to live fully in the present, whatever it contains.
Because of our emphasis on individualism rather than community, gratitude is easily overlooked as an important element of a satisfying life.
A life without gratitude is a joyless life. If we don’t have anything to be grateful about, our life is a dreary plane. …
Many of us have had fortunate lives, but although we have been born in fortunate places we can tend to take a lot for granted. We have privileges and benefits, and a much better life than a good portion of people in the world can ever hope to expect. There’s a lot to be grateful for … (from https://dhammatalks.net/Books3/Ajahn_Sumedho_Gratitude_to_Parents.htm)
In addition, practicing gratitude is a direct cure for self-obsession. Are we ready to give up the idea that we are the most important person in the world? If we spend some time every day appreciating others in our lives, it loosens the chains of self-importance.
Within Buddhist thinking on virtue, there are things we ought to refrain from doing, and things we ought to deliberately do. We refrain from harming other sentient beings; we support the safety and growth of other lives. This training is the basis for Buddhist ethics and cannot be skipped over. As with generosity and gratitude, understanding them is insufficient as a foundation for practice. To grow in the Dhamma, we need to continuously nourish and strengthen these skillful qualities in ourselves.
One of the senior monks in the Ajahn Chah lineage said that Buddha talked about dāna[giving] first because if someone didn’t understand the value of basic generosity, they weren’t even teachable. If we don’t have a sense of its significance, and don’t have some degree of maturity in our experience of it, then other forms of practice—sīla, bhāvana, mettā—won’t even get off the ground. There has to be a malleability of heart, a softness, a diminished self-absorption, before the engines can even get started! And this softness is developed largely through our increasingly mature direct experience of dāna.
Giving as a ritual is not the same as giving as practice. There can be various motives for giving, and many of them have to do with varieties of clinging. We cling to the idea of what is expected of us, or what would “look good”, or we give to relieve a feeling of guilt, or even because we think it will produce a better afterlife. But there is a higher motivation that we can tap into, one that moves us away from any form of clinging.
(from Gloria Taraniya Ambrosia) There’s a wonderful story in the Vināya (Mahāvagga 8:15) about a very generous laywoman who lived at the time of the Buddha. As the story goes, she wanted to give a large gift to the community—lifetime gifts of food, clothing and medicinal requisites. Before agreeing to receive this offering, the Buddha asked Visakha why she wanted to make such a generous offering.
Her reply may surprise you. She said that when she sees the monks and nuns she will know that they are wearing robes made out of the cloth that she offered, etc., and it will make her very happy. Thus, her mind will be calm and her meditation will go well. As if to say, “Yes, that’s the right answer,” the Buddha accepted her gift.
So we can give to make our minds peaceful and happy. This may sound like a selfish motive – we want to be happy – but this sort of happiness comes from profound unselfishness, which feels entirely different from building up our self-image. Is this happening without our noticing it? Do we overlook this subtle and beautiful feeling?
Only we know what is in our minds and hearts, and we can track whether we are producing the kind of mental peace that is the foundation for wisdom or the product of a satisfied ego. Mindfulness is essential to discern this difference, but once we see it, we are naturally inclined to pursue a wholesome path.
Patience has always been a challenge for me. Lynn J Kelly’s blog post today (see link below) helps me better understand how my impatience is a form of anger which I would be much better off without.
“Have patience with all things but first of all with yourself.” – Francis de Sales
“Pursuing beneficial practices brings good kamma, and that can overcome any past unwholesome kamma. It’s not a closed system, it’s not fate; it’s a dynamic process.”
Lynn J Kelly blogpost today reminds us our actions matter every minute of every day. We can improve our lives when we seek the good of others too.
Lynn J Kelly regularly shares wisdom and compassion in her blog posts. The one linked below is especially helpful to me today. I hope you find it helpful as well.
Lynn J Kelly provides us with another “pearl of wisdom” with her post below. As she says:
“We want to train ourselves to avoid acting (or speaking) when we are angry or displeased. The mind state comes before the action and can be worked with before any harming occurs. The Buddha put this practice first on his list of guidelines for training laypeople because it may be the primary way we harm ourselves and others.”
May we avoid harming ourselves and others more skillfully today. _/\_
Life Matters 