High Coo – September 3 – Our Life Is Our Message


My father was a carpenter who became a Skilled Trades Supervisor for a major US utility.  He retired early to golf, fish and construct wood picture frames for fun. 

My first father-in-law was a Welding Foreman for a global office furniture manufacturer who turned down a promotion to Production Superintendent to ensure he had time for the freshwater fishing and the golf that he loved. 

My second father-in-law was a Production and Inventory Control Manager who went on to become CEO of the same global office furniture manufacturer.  He retired and was recalled for a year before living another 25 years, many on the golf course and doing some occasional fishing.

So, what do these three men tell me; what can I learn from my “forefathers?” Is my life a journey from blue to white collar work and are my “golden years” to be spent enjoying fishing and golf?

My father told his four sons to retire earlier than he did at age 59 because retirement was the best time of life.  My father died at age 77 and had only one regret that I know of which was agreeing to elective heart surgery to replace a pacemaker.  He died one week after the surgery and told his sons at his hospital bedside what a mistake it was to agree to that final surgery.

My first father-in-law told me to get a couple of hobbies early in life to ensure I had a way to escape home life whenever I needed.  He advised specifically joining him in fishing and golf, which I did for many years.  He died at age 64 of medical complications from diabetes.

My second father-in-law advised world travel which was another hobby he had.  Otherwise, he didn’t say that much to me as he was very active in his own pursuits and demonstrated his values more than spoke of them.  He died at age 93 and unfortunately his last three years were using a walker and napping a lot.  He had beaten colon cancer, multiple melanomas (from so much fishing and golf?), and finally the debilitation brought on from a stroke.

I gave up golf many years ago and haven’t fished in years.  My full-time work life began as a spot welder and progressed to a Human Resources Director before moving on to my career as a Human Capital Consultant for the last 24 years. So, some similarities to my forefathers but some possible differences in my final life chapter. 

I’m now focused on joining the Order of Interbeing as a Zen Christian practitioner and my goal this year is to begin an Animal Chaplaincy program, write a fourth book of poetry and become a Dharma Mentor in the next year or so.

Not sure how much longer I might live but want to live my “golden years” doing what I love.   How about you?

Today’s haiku: Our Life Is Our Message

How much choice is there?

How much control do we have?

Hmmm, time to walk dogs.


7 thoughts on “High Coo – September 3 – Our Life Is Our Message

  1. Dr B

    That’s a really interesting post Patrick, descriptive, emotional and also very insightful. There’s a lot of personal reflection going on in it too I guess. You’re probably as widely read as myself but you might like to read about Eriksons 8 stages of life with both of us in stage 8! Anyway, I had a similarly intense career, a practice retirement for a year at 55, then full retirement at 60. Exploring our lives, values and aims led us to create and run an educational ngo in Nepal. This was mixed with world travel including cruises, China, USA and classical European cities. Health issue has slowed Dr C down, so travel is now local and I am starting to do voluntary “friendship telephone sessions” with lonely seniors. In reverse, I left school at 16, but got a PhD, held board positions with Financial Services companies, and ran my own business. Positive reflections as per Erikson? You bet. Did I fish or play golf? Nope! I took up ice climbing! My father was a Coldstream Guardsman who escaped Dunkirk in WW2, my F in Law was a poor man in Kathmandu but who inspired the education of his 4 daughters, Going back in time my English ancestors were all navvies and miners!

    Liked by 1 person


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